. Naked Trees

My favorite time of year...

. Favourite Beer of the Week

Primator Double Bock is the most alcoholy tasting beer I have ever tasted. At least, I think it's the alcohol I am tasting. It's 10.5% abv for goodness sake.



Its rich and malty and very, very sweet. Hang on, I'm going to ask Nif to try it. Nif doesn't like beer.


Nif says, "It's not bad. It tastes a bit like port."

She's right. That's exactly what it tastes like.

"And Pu-erh tea. It numbs the tongue like pu-erh tea."

I'll take Nif's word on that. I don't like tea.

Bock Beers were orignally brewed in the 15th century by Italian monks who were required to fast during Lent, so they drank this "nutrient-rich" beer instead. I'm drinking it with a sensible snack of celery and humous, and I'm still getting drunk. Those monks must have been off their tits.

. Book of the Month

I have not read many books in the last couple of years. I have listened to a lot of audio books that I borrow from the library and illegally download into my ipod and play in the car on the drive to and from work, up and down highway 280, twice a day, 5 days a week, 360 hours a year.

But listening to an audio book is not the same as reading. When you read a book it's just you and the words. When you listen to a book it's you and the words and someone else telling you how to feel about them before you get a chance to make up your own mind.

So this year I have determined to read more actual books. A book a month. This month's book was "Candide" by Voltaire.

Here is my report:

[spoiler alert!]

Candide is an innocent young man who loses the girl he fancies and spends the rest of the book wandering around the world looking for her. And as he wanders he tries to figure out if it is "the best of all possible worlds," while he (along with pretty much everyone else in the book) is beaten, tortured, raped, robbed, swindled, imprisoned, enslaved, betrayed, and killed.



So it's kind of a black comedy in the guise of a romantic adventure. And lots of satirical jokes are made about religion, philosophy, science, law, war, mathematics, and all the stuff that the author didn't like, including publishers, journalists, the opera, the British, and Jews.

It was written in the 18th century, so half the book is footnotes that explain why the jokes are funny. So they are not.

Next month I will be reading "The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo", the European bestseller by muckraking Swedish journalist Stieg Larsson.

Why don't you read it too? You can tell me what you think. It will be like a Book Club, but no one will have to clean their house and make tea.

. An Apology

I would like to apologize to my lovely wife for posting my previous post right on top of her post about the Kala Open Studios, which is today, and you should go, cos she's brilliant.

Sorry.

. 33 years ago

In 1977 I am 8 years old. What else happens?

Let's take a look.

Star Wars opens and becomes the highest grossing film of all time.


Mull of Kintyre becomes the UK's best selling single of all time.


The Sex Pistols release "Never Mind the Bollocks Here's The Sex Pistols"


Elvis Presley dies.


Apple Computers release the Apple II. It costs $1300, and has 4K of RAM.


The Queen has her silver jubilee.


We have a street party and I dress as an octopus.


The USA reinstates the death penalty and executes serial killer Gary Gilmore by firing squad.


Red Rum wins the Grand National for the third time.


Ford launches the Granada.


A 44 pound lobster is caught off Nova Scotia.


Kenny Dalglish becomes Britain's most expensive football player ever.


San Francisco elects Harvey Milk.


The cold war continues.


I am at my Uncle Jeff's farm in Skipwith, North Yorkshire, in little brown shorts and a Micky Mouse t-shirt.

. Kala Open Studios

Kala Artist-in-Residence Open Studio
2990 San Pablo Ave (between Ashby & Heinz)
January 23rd, 11am-5pm
http://kala.org/event/event.html#open_st

Tales of Mr. Fritz (part one)

. New Construction

David Trubridge says putting up his lampshade takes one hour and no tools. Ours took three days and one tool (the tool being Anthony when he shorted the old light fixture and we had to call out an electrician to fix it).

. It's cold in the old country

. Golden Gate Park

New paths, new things to pick up off the ground & put in Anthony's pockets.

. Bubbling Brew

lazy carbon dioxide micro-kneading tastes good...

. Favourite Beer of the Week

Coffee in the morning and wine in the evening and everything else is boring boring.

That's what indie pop diva Lisa Germano sings on 'Bruises', the third track of her 1996 album 'Excerpts from a Love Circus' (the one before her record label dumped her and she joined the Smashing Pumpkins and got fired immediately and worked in a Hollywood bookstore and got signed again and released three more albums).

And she makes a good point.

Until you consider Lagunitas Cappuccino Stout. Is it a coffee? Is it a delicious alcoholic beverage? Is it both?

What would Lisa Germano think?


I think it's rather nice. It's not as coffee-ish as Hitachino Espresso Stout. But then cappuccino is not as coffee-ish as espresso. So that makes sense.


Lagunitas Cappuccino Stout was recommended to me by our good friend Erik Marr, who knows all about beer, and has a spinning cat.



Lisa Germano loves cats. Her latest album, Magic Neighbor, is all about them.

Coffee in the morning and wine in the evening and everything else is boring boring, except maybe a cocktail-hour cappuccino stout.

And cats.

. The Future

Remember "Scramble" in the 80's?


We used to play a version on your ZX Spectrum called "Penetrator." Sounds a bit rude now, but it didn't then.


Well, there's a new game called "Pixeljunk Shooter" that you can download straight into your PS3. It's old-school style two-player side-scrolling fun for all the family. Might be something diverting to do in the dying hours of the Christmas hols to keep your mind off the fast approaching awfulness of Monday morning.


And it costs less than Penetrator did in 1982.


And you can play with a friend at the same time! But not online. So not with me.

So much for the future.

. Muir Beach coastal trail

Come with us now on a pleasant winter walk along the Muir Beach coastal trail.


Out of the parking lot. Past the portable toilets. Hang a right at the sticky monkeyflower.

Who's this?


Skirt the horse corral. Cyclists and equestrians welcome. It's good to be outdoors, isn't it?


Turn right onto Green Gulch Trail. Don't forget to close the gate.


Or the shadowy deer demon will poop on you.


This land belongs to Green Gulch farms.


They make vegetables for San Francisco restaurants like "Greens".


Here's a spiky farm thing they use for farming.


Some parts of the trail are a bit muddy. We'll have to clean our shoes before we get back in the car.



Stop messing about now. We're coming to the Zen Center. What do you think they do with all these pipes?


That's a strange place to have a bath.


We can see the cars on the other side of the valley. I wonder if they can see us.


It's getting a bit steeper now. Don't get left behind.


Try taking longer strides. Open your hips. Lengthen your psoaz. Redwood trees, Douglas fir, coyote brush and cow parsnip. Watch out for the poison oak. Do you know what it looks like?

Neither do I.

Maybe it's growing in here.


We'll stop for lunch soon. Yes, I know I said that 20 minutes ago.
Let's pause a while and enjoy the view. Look how far we've come already.


We've found a little house. There's a bench out back. Maybe we can sit on it while we eat our lunch.


The sign on the gate says private property. But no one seems to be home. We won't be long.


Let's exchange potato chips.


These kettle chips are the color of shoe laces.


Looks like it's time to hit the trail again.


Not much further to the top. 900 feet vertical elevation. You can see our house from here.


What's that moving on the path up ahead?


It's a bobcat.


Pick up the children, wave your arms around, don't turn your back, and throw things. On second thoughts, let's just walk past.

Someone else has been this way.


Cloven hooves. The devil, perhaps.

Never mind that, look at the view.


It's all downhill from here.


Take your time on the way down. There's no need to hurry. The ground is uneven and it's easy to sprain an ankle.


Hey, who's this?


He looks familiar.


See you next time.


It's almost over now. Do you feel a bit sad? You can see the parking lot through the trees. And the portable toilets.


Back on the road. Wait a minute, I've heard about this place. Stop the car!


Cheers!

. Justification

Earlier this year Plymouth University researchers carried out a series of memory tests.

Doodlers performed 29% better than non-doodlers, the team found.

. Favourite Beer of the Week - special Christmas edition

Trois Pistoles is one of those Frenchy-Canadian Unibrou beers that come in the big corked bottles with the jolly high abv.

It looks like this:



and it is named after a town that looks like this:


that has a building that looks like this:


which on the beer bottle label looks like this:


and is the setting for the "Legend of the Black Horse", which I could only find in French, so I ran it through a google text translator, and it said this:

The mysterious animal appeared without anyone knowing where he came from and was used to transport the stone from the church down to the coast where they erected a new building. But it was the devil himself that one should never remove his bridle. Unfortunately, someone ignored the recommendation and the horse disappeared, work not yet completed. And that is why there is still a stone missing, as can be seen when visiting the village church in Trois Pistoles.

Crap legend. But it's a nice beer. It tastes like all the other Unibroue beers - rich and thick and sweet and malty. I drank it on Christmas Eve while I was making leek and artichoke crepes, except the cans of artichoke hearts I had bought turned out to be cans of 'heart of palm', which looks quite strange, like this:


but taste fairly similar to artichokes once you've added leeks and cheese and mushrooms and nutmeg and stuff.

And then it was Christmas.

Amen.

. Other Doodles

. It Isn't Christmas

...without a cat in a box.